Smil... Smile'... ;-)
Dear Wife:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm
leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for
seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss
called to tell me that you quit your job today
and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even
notice that I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite
meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in two minutes, and went straight to
sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell
me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or
anything that connects us as husband and wife.
Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me
anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving
moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your
letter. It's true that you and I have been married
for seven years, although a good man is a far cry
from what you've been.
I watch my soaps so much because they drown
out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that
doesn't work.
I did notice when you got a hair cut last week, but
the first thing that came to mind was 'You
look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me
not to say anything if you can't say something nice,
I didn't comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you
must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER,
because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you
because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and
I prayed that it was a coincidence that my sister
had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that
we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for
ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two
tickets to Jamaica . But when I got home you were
gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always
wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote
ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my
sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem.
😉[s];-)
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm
leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for
seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss
called to tell me that you quit your job today
and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even
notice that I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite
meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in two minutes, and went straight to
sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell
me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or
anything that connects us as husband and wife.
Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me
anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving
moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your
letter. It's true that you and I have been married
for seven years, although a good man is a far cry
from what you've been.
I watch my soaps so much because they drown
out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that
doesn't work.
I did notice when you got a hair cut last week, but
the first thing that came to mind was 'You
look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me
not to say anything if you can't say something nice,
I didn't comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you
must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER,
because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you
because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and
I prayed that it was a coincidence that my sister
had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that
we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for
ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two
tickets to Jamaica . But when I got home you were
gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always
wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote
ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my
sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem.
😉[s];-)