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Below is the appendix being studied at the book studies on how to treat a dfed person...from last year's release Keep Yourself in God's Love:
Notice it says strict shunning is necessary and not to expand the necessary family business...
How to Treat a Disfellowshipped Person
Few things can hurt us more deeply than the pain we suffer when a relative or a
close friend is expelled from the congregation for unrepentant sin. How we respond
to the Bible's direction on this matter can reveal the depth of our love for God and of
our loyalty to his arrangement:* Consider some questions that arise on this subject.
How should we treat a disfellowshipped person? The Bible says: "Quit mixing in
company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person or an
idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man."
(1 Corinthians 5:11) Regarding everyone that "does not remain in the teaching of the
Christ," we read: "Never receive him into your homes or say a greeting to him. For he
that says a greeting to him is a sharer in his wicked works." (2 John 9-11) We do not
have spiritual or social fellowship with disfellowshipped ones. The Watchtower of
September 15, 1981, page 25, stated: "A simple 'Hello' to someone can be the first
step that develops into a conversation and maybe even a friendship. Would we want
to take that first step with a disfellowshiped person?"
Is strict avoidance really necessary? Yes, for several reasons. First, it is a matter
of loyalty to God and his Word. We obey Jehovah not only when it is convenient but
also when doing so presents real challenges. Love for God moves us to obey all his
commandments, recognizing that he is just and loving and that his laws promote the
greatest good. (Isaiah 48:17; 1 John 5:3) Second, withdrawing from an unrepentant
wrongdoer protects us and the rest of the congregation from spiritual and moral
contamination and upholds the congregation's good name. (1 Corinthians 5:6, 7)
Third, our firm stand for Bible principles may even benefit the disfellowshipped one.
By supporting the decision of the judicial committee, we may touch the heart of a
wrongdoer who thus far has failed to respond to the efforts of the elders to assist
him. Losing precious fellowship with loved ones may help him to come "to his
senses," see the seriousness of his wrong, and take steps to return to Jehovah.
-Luke 15:17.
What if a relative is disfellowshipped? In such a case, the close bond between
family members can pose a real test of loyalty. How should we treat a
disfellowshipped relative? We cannot here cover every situation that may arise, but
let us focus on two basic ones.
In some instances, the disfellowshipped family member may still be living in the
same home as part of the immediate household. Since his being disfellowshipped
does not sever the family ties, normal day-to-day family activities and dealings may
continue. Yet, by his course, the individual has chosen to break the spiritual bond
between him and his believing family. So loyal family members can no longer have
spiritual fellowship with him. For example, if the disfellowshipped one is present, he
would not participate when the family gets together to study the Bible. However, if
the disfellowshipped one is a minor child, the parents are still responsible to instruct
and discipline him. Hence, loving parents may arrange to conduct a Bible study with
the child.* -Proverbs 6:20-22; 29:17.
In other cases, the disfellowshipped relative may be living outside the immediate
family circle and home. Although there might be a need for limited contact on some
rare occasion to care for a necessary family matter, any such contact should be kept
to a minimum. Loyal Christian family members do not look for excuses to have
dealings with a disfellowshipped relative not living at home. Rather, loyalty to
Jehovah and his organization moves. them to uphold the Scriptural arrangement of
disfellowshipping. Their loyal course has the best interests of the wrongdoer at heart
and may help him to benefit from the discipline received.* -Hebrews 12:11.
[Footnote]
* Bible principles on this subject apply equally to those who disassociate themselves
from the congregation.
* For more information about disfellowshipped minor children living in the home, see
The Watchtower of October 1, 2001, pages 16-17, and November 15,1988, page 20.
* For more information about how to treat disfellowshipped relatives, see the
Scriptural counsel discussed in The Watchtower of April 15, 1988, pages 26-31, and
September 15, 1981, pages 26-31.
kilde http://www.channelc.org/ChCForum/forum/index.php?action=display&forumid=1&msgid=32
Notice it says strict shunning is necessary and not to expand the necessary family business...
How to Treat a Disfellowshipped Person
Few things can hurt us more deeply than the pain we suffer when a relative or a
close friend is expelled from the congregation for unrepentant sin. How we respond
to the Bible's direction on this matter can reveal the depth of our love for God and of
our loyalty to his arrangement:* Consider some questions that arise on this subject.
How should we treat a disfellowshipped person? The Bible says: "Quit mixing in
company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person or an
idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man."
(1 Corinthians 5:11) Regarding everyone that "does not remain in the teaching of the
Christ," we read: "Never receive him into your homes or say a greeting to him. For he
that says a greeting to him is a sharer in his wicked works." (2 John 9-11) We do not
have spiritual or social fellowship with disfellowshipped ones. The Watchtower of
September 15, 1981, page 25, stated: "A simple 'Hello' to someone can be the first
step that develops into a conversation and maybe even a friendship. Would we want
to take that first step with a disfellowshiped person?"
Is strict avoidance really necessary? Yes, for several reasons. First, it is a matter
of loyalty to God and his Word. We obey Jehovah not only when it is convenient but
also when doing so presents real challenges. Love for God moves us to obey all his
commandments, recognizing that he is just and loving and that his laws promote the
greatest good. (Isaiah 48:17; 1 John 5:3) Second, withdrawing from an unrepentant
wrongdoer protects us and the rest of the congregation from spiritual and moral
contamination and upholds the congregation's good name. (1 Corinthians 5:6, 7)
Third, our firm stand for Bible principles may even benefit the disfellowshipped one.
By supporting the decision of the judicial committee, we may touch the heart of a
wrongdoer who thus far has failed to respond to the efforts of the elders to assist
him. Losing precious fellowship with loved ones may help him to come "to his
senses," see the seriousness of his wrong, and take steps to return to Jehovah.
-Luke 15:17.
What if a relative is disfellowshipped? In such a case, the close bond between
family members can pose a real test of loyalty. How should we treat a
disfellowshipped relative? We cannot here cover every situation that may arise, but
let us focus on two basic ones.
In some instances, the disfellowshipped family member may still be living in the
same home as part of the immediate household. Since his being disfellowshipped
does not sever the family ties, normal day-to-day family activities and dealings may
continue. Yet, by his course, the individual has chosen to break the spiritual bond
between him and his believing family. So loyal family members can no longer have
spiritual fellowship with him. For example, if the disfellowshipped one is present, he
would not participate when the family gets together to study the Bible. However, if
the disfellowshipped one is a minor child, the parents are still responsible to instruct
and discipline him. Hence, loving parents may arrange to conduct a Bible study with
the child.* -Proverbs 6:20-22; 29:17.
In other cases, the disfellowshipped relative may be living outside the immediate
family circle and home. Although there might be a need for limited contact on some
rare occasion to care for a necessary family matter, any such contact should be kept
to a minimum. Loyal Christian family members do not look for excuses to have
dealings with a disfellowshipped relative not living at home. Rather, loyalty to
Jehovah and his organization moves. them to uphold the Scriptural arrangement of
disfellowshipping. Their loyal course has the best interests of the wrongdoer at heart
and may help him to benefit from the discipline received.* -Hebrews 12:11.
[Footnote]
* Bible principles on this subject apply equally to those who disassociate themselves
from the congregation.
* For more information about disfellowshipped minor children living in the home, see
The Watchtower of October 1, 2001, pages 16-17, and November 15,1988, page 20.
* For more information about how to treat disfellowshipped relatives, see the
Scriptural counsel discussed in The Watchtower of April 15, 1988, pages 26-31, and
September 15, 1981, pages 26-31.
kilde http://www.channelc.org/ChCForum/forum/index.php?action=display&forumid=1&msgid=32